Lately I have been reading a lot of self development books that involve communication because I mean everyone, I mean unless your an extreme loner (which is fine) communicates. Now aside from some other major factors a re-appearing theme seems to be empathy or in other words caring about others. In fact I believe that in one of Dale Carnegie books he says if everyone cared about one another and rarely about ourselves than we’d have an almost perfect world.
Today I’m going to talk about how to effectively and genuinely care about others and why it is important. If you apply what I am about to tell you correctly you’ll notice personal and social gains. People will be more apt to want to help you out because they like you.
First thing First
First I’m going to talk about several (but not all) ways to care about people in more genuine and effective way. The first way is general appreciation. Please and this is where most people fail, don’t get this confused with flattery.
Flattery is telling someone something they already know or want to hear the problem with this is it can be easily be detected and can often be taken as an insult. Imagine someone flattering you and then asking you for something I mean your not going to instantly dislike them but you’ll sorta resent them for all the kind statements knowing that they only said them to get something. Instead I recommend genuine appreciation.
Now genuine appreciation means talking about and admiring something that you really find unique or different about them. If you really believe in your statements the’ll come through as believable and you’ll be looked at as sincere.
Another good way to show you care about someone is talking about them. This can be as simple as asking them what they are doing or how they are doing. Now I’ll let you in on a secret this statements are so general they often don’t exhibit care but instead exhibit “small talk” or general conversation.
I recommend finding out what they are interested in and what they like to do which may require a little effort or research on your part but work a lot. Once you find something they are passionate about let them go on and on about what they like without ever getting impatient or cutting them off. Even if you don’t get what you intended out of the conversation you’ll be 10x more likely to get it later than at that moment because they’ll really take into account that you listened to them. They’ll also take into account that you care about them.
Now there is much more that can be said about care and how to treat people but I have highlighted two of the fundamentals. Those again are: Genuine appreciation and sincere interest. I will be posting more about this topic and other related topics until than stay happy.
We are afraid to care too much, for fear that the other person does not care at all. -Eleanor Roosevelt
Today’s Fast Fact:
Dale Carnegie came from rural farmers and became one of the world’s greatest speakers, what’s your excuse?
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